I went back to my apartment and found Rich asleep on the couch and I sat beside him and woke him up.

*Hey baby,* I said as I leaned down and kissed his cheek and he groaned, stretched and then sat up slowly.

*How was your night?* He asked sarcastically and I sighed.

*Nothing happened... he just wanted to get together because we haven't seen each other in a while and we had dinner.* I explained, hesitating. I was thinking that if I was in Rich's shoes I would be completely pissed at him.

*Yeah, but I thought you had a lot of work?* Rich asked.

*I did, you saw me doin it. He was helping, that's all.* I replied and he looked at me for a minute and then looked down at his hands.

*I don't know Meagan... I mean, I trust you. But I know how you feel about him and now you're having dinner with him?* Rich asked me and I sat next to him and played with his fingers.

*Just dinner.* I added softly.

*Yeah, but this is serious. Getting married is serious.* He explained and I smiled and nodded.

*I know,* I said.

*And you're sure you want to marry me?* He asked and I looked up into his eyes and kissed his lips softly and nodded yes.

The Next Day

*Hey...* AJ said walking up to me in the restaurant that morning and I turned around and smiled at him.

*Okay, everything's good now right?* I asked, looking back at the chef and he nodded and I said goodbye. *Hi.* I said as I started walking and he followed me.

*I just wanted to see how everything went last night.* He asked concerned and it made me think if he really had feelings for me anymore. He seemed so okay with the fact that I was dating another man.

*Yeah, he was fine.* I said with a smile.

*Good so, uh, what's the deal with you guys?* AJ asked and I looked at him and cocked one eyebrow. *I mean, have you been together since I left?* He added and I shrugged.

*Yeah... we're getting married.* I replied, sort of hoping for him to scream NO. Being with AJ for those couple days made me realize that I wasn't ready to get married but I gave Rich my word, and I really did love him.

*Wow.* He stated, genuinely surprised and I smiled and kept walking. *Uhm, where are you going?* AJ asked, obviously trying to steer clear of the word married.

*Uhm...* I said turning around and clutching the clipboard I was holding with both hands as I stared into space. *Nowhere.* I said finally and then looked at him and grinned a little. We talked for a few minutes and then we said goodbye for the day.

I was sitting at the big chair in my big empty office and thinking how really empty it was. I had no one in my life that I could call close except maybe Nikki, but she was a little sketchy sometimes. I thought about Rich... I should be able to say he was close to me, after all, we were getting married. But the thought of me standing next to him for the rest of my life gave me chills and I quickly dismissed the image from my mind, I did not want to think of that right now because I really didn't know what to do about it. I was wandering the halls, letting my mind wander as well and before I knew it, I ended up in front of AJ's room. I sighed and turned to walk away at least five times but I kept turning back until I finally turned away for good.

*Meg?* I heard AJ's voice and I looked over my shoulder and saw him standing in his doorway. *What are you doing?* He asked a little suspiciously, he must have heard me pacing outside his door. I walked back over and stood in front of him and for a minute I just stared at him and he looked uncomfortable like he wanted me to say something.

*AJ...* I whispered, looking down at the carpeted floor and without another thought I whisked my arms around his neck and pressed my lips to his, pushing us both backwards into his room and slamming the door. I kissed him harder and with more passion each time and before I knew it, he had me pinned against the wall, holding my arms at my sides and he had stopped kissing me.

*What... are you doing?* He asked, out of breath and I kept my eyes open as I tried to think but eventually, just shook my head. *You don't know what you're doing?* AJ asked, doing all the talking and I just nodded. *Say something!* He demanded but I kept quiet. *You can't just kiss someone like you just kissed me and have nothing to say...* AJ kept on talking, wanting to get something out of me, an answer or anything. But I didn't have an answer... I was getting married, I was the least sane person in the room. Things stayed quiet for at least five minutes, and we didn't move our positions until he slowly let go of my arms, but I kept them against the wall. AJ's hands moved up the sides of my body and to my neck and then through my hair, slowly, and I closed my eyes, savoring his touch. *Can I kiss you again?* He asked softly and I opened my eyes and nodded my head and then I felt his lips against mine again and it was the best feeling in the world. And I wondered how I let him leave my life the last time, and what it would be like this time when he was ready to leave again...

*You're the most beautiful, interesting, intelligent... spectacular person I've ever met.* AJ whispered against the soft skin of my stomach. Now we were lain out on his bed, his naked body over mine and I still hadn't spoken to him. I just smiled at his comment and pulled his face up to mine, kissing him again. I couldn't get enough of the feel of our mouths together... it felt so right, just like the rest of our body felt when we were touching... so right. *Let me make love to you.* AJ said softly, but clearly, and I just closed my eyes and pushed my head back into the pillow as I felt him enter me. He started slow but sped up, making me feel better then the last time I had been with him, if it was possible. I knew right then... actually, I knew when I spontaneously kissed him, that I was in love with him. A different kind of love then I would ever have or feel for Rich. And then as if on cue he leaned down and whispered into my ear:

*I love you.* And we both exploded into each other, with our arms wrapped around our bodies, not even knowing who was who. *We made one out of two...* He whispered into my ear as he lay next to me a while after and I turned to face him and felt a tear roll down the side of my face.

*I'm scared...* I whispered and he put his comforting hands on the sides of my face and looked into my eyes.

*I'll protect you...* He whispered back and I tried to smile through my tears.

*I think that I love you so much... that I'll lose you.* I admitted and he just kissed my face all over, licking my tears away and whispering that it would be okay.